Family
by kuroXIII
Summary: Harry Dresden is the mother. Of Ivy. There's something wrong here. Kincaid/Dresden/Marcone


**Kincaid/Dresden/Marcone, Ivy. Family**

"What?"

A sort of buzzing sound filled my head for I moment while I failed to comprehend what he just said. Kincaid simply stared back calmly while Ivy occupied herself with Mister. It must have shown on my face because Kincaid raised an eyebrow at my dazed expression.

"You're Ivy's mother."

My mind blinked out again. It is not possible for men to have children I thought. Also, besides that, I haven't been with anyone for ages. ...However, I did have a rather eccentric fairy godmother and the Queen of Winter, both of whom love to mess with my daily life. So, it wouldn't be too strange if they... did something to me that I wasn't aware...of...

My wide eyed, panicked glance towards my stomach made Kinclaid give me an amused look while his mouth was twitching to not laugh. I felt a bright, red heat cover my face as I tried to regain some semblance of authority. It didn't work. I coughed.

"What do you mean Ivy's mother? If you haven't noticed, I don't exactly have the parts to be her mother; much less give birth to her."

"Well...," he dragged on the word as if making an announcement. "After what happened on that ...island, she wanted us to be closer since she thinks of you as family. Because of that, I decided that if we're doing this, then I'm going to be the father," he stated his explanation as if it was a fact.

I was temporary stunned and honored that Ivy thought of me like family. It made me blush again while a warm feeling filled my stomach. But, then outrage shocked my brain back into action.

"Hey!" I started, "What makes you decide that my position to be the mother?"

He give me one look, taking in my tall yet thin (it's lean, damn it) figure, and met my eyes again. I nearly faltered, but I held my stance. So what if I wasn't as strong as him physically. I could still take on tough opponents and blast them away as if they were like paper. Well... I suppose that's on a good day, without evil supervillians trying to take over the world again... which is practically every week, month, take-your-pick day.

Before I could break into my rant of righteous justice, he interrupted me with a serious yet gentle voice while looking at Ivy. I looked as well. She was nuzzling her face into Mister's soft fur. He bored it with royal like patience. I reminded myself to get more coke for Mister. And more food for Mouse since she was doing that while sitting on Mouse. It was a very heartwarming picture.

"Ivy feels safe around you," he said in a soft, but firm voice. I was startled that he was revealing this so casually, but I realized that he was trying to make me understand. "You gave her a name. Technically, in a way, you did give birth to her. She's not just the archive anymore, she's Ivy, a little girl who wants to protect everyone in the only way she can. She actually took on some of your personality so you're a part of her."

I stared at Kincaid while he gazed at Ivy with a fond smile. I felt somewhat humbled as I took this all in. What he said seemed to make me think it wasn't as bad as I thought it was._ It would be nice to have a family... _The thought passed through my mind. It seems like even my subconscious is trying to convince me, which showed that I lost even before I have begun. I sighed.

"Fine. I'll accept the position," I told him, "But you better not expect me to be the one to tell her how babies are born when she gets older." I stated with a straight face and smiled on the inside when he paled slightly. Wait. Did that mean she didn't understand how babies are born? Huh.

When he regained his equilibrium, he stared at me with amazement before shaking it off. Heh. We stared at each other (But we were still avoiding eye contact. Still too early for that.) and regarded each other with trust before looking at the reason why we were doing this. For her.

It was quiet for moment before he decided to spoil the mood.

"Of course, although you're technically my "wife" (Bastard said it with amusement. Jerk.) you do realize that you still have to pay for my help right? Nothing really changes about that."

I gaped at him, stunned. That bastard has the nerve to talk shop while discussing about something this important-

"Of course," he murmured, his voice deepening, "You can pay for my services... in another form of payment if you wish." His eyes were smoldering, making my spine shiver as he looked at me from top to bottom in a much less... clinical matter. That look was not innocent at all.

I blushed.

"What? What are you saying?" I almost took a step back, but his gaze pinned me down (_wonder what will happen if he really pinned me down- Shut up minime! ...Wow that sounded wrong. Of course, that happened to be the moment my pants... weren't as... baggy as they should be...)_ and gave me a (_sexy-stop it!)_ grin.

"Don't worry," he smirked, "I buy you chocolate and flowers first before we... do anything too strainful for you." My face was practically burning as stepped closer with a predatory look. Then he stopped, as if remembering something else.

"Oh yeah, before I forget, John Marcone is the other father as well so I guess you'll be... entertaining the both of us," he calmly stated with a cheeky grin (_the bastard_).

Wait a minute.

A _mafia boss (free holding baron) _and a _mercenary for hire (part demon)._

Both of whom have an unusual amount of interest in me.

As my _husbands_.

**ENTERTAINING. THEM. BOTH.**

I couldn't help it. I fainted, blushing a glowing red.


End file.
